Yenti Eats Three Sandwiches
"They're a bit larger than I expected they would be" Yenti said while carefully considering each sandwich before her. This was the fifth time today she had requested food be brought to her throne, and each time the meal was larger than the last. This time, surprisingly, Yenti had ordered for three large sandwiches to be brought forwards for her consideration. Although the sandwiches themselves weren't much to ponder at, the nature of the meal did at least temporarily grab the attention of the attending staff around her highness. "I normally wouldn't do something like this while on my pretty little throne, but to hell with it all" Yenti sighed while considering her options. Sitting in front of her were three sandwiches: one salami with cheese, one tomato with genoa, and another that was so wrapped in paper that Yenti couldn't tell what it was. Yenti closed her eyes and mumbled incoherently. The process of choosing which sandwich to eat first is certain to be a great struggle for a powerful divine being such as herself. She had no idea which tastes complemented eachother or even which bread would hold up after the time it takes to finish one sandwich. If Yenti chooses the wrong one, the other two could expire by the time she's done! Truly, she had a dilemma to deal with. The servants and politicians around Yenti held their collective breath, awaiting a response from the goddess. "Yes, well, I suppose I should start with the one in the middle. That's always the best course of action for tough times such as these." The tension in the room vanished, as the burning question of the hour had finally been answered. Yenti reached out and grabbed a sandwich from the platter brought to her. It was the salami grinder. The bread gave way to the pressure of her fingers, soft in doughy humility towards the divinity it beheld. Yenti carefully measured the weight of the sandwich in her hands, making sure to assume full understanding of the item before herself. At long last, Yenti took a bite of the salami grinder. Oil and meat rushed forwards to explode a miraculous range of flavor within her very being. Yes, this was a good sandwich. This sandwich, this work of art, was a true testament to the ingredients held within. All aspects of this object were carefully crafted to please Yenti's divine tastes, and maybe keep her sated for at least a few minutes. Tragedy struck! Wasted food had leapt from the sandwich and straight onto Yenti's right cheek. Nearby servants could be seen quietly gasping in silent horror, waiting for the eventual wrath of the bloody-golden warlord. After all, Yenti had always been the angry powderkeg of the four great divines created by the meek goddess Llin in the infant era of the known universe. What would Yenti do when she discovered her messy errors? Perhaps she would take it out on one of the many maidservants of the Citadel, as the goddess has done many times before. The goddess was known for her unending lust for the bodies of the innocent maidens comprising the workforce. The majority of the maids working nearby backed away from Yenti, hoping that they wouldn't be chosen to clean the food off her face with their mouths. Just the thought of the goddess tearing off their clothes and feasting on the trembling naked bodies within made them shudder. To the relief of her peers, however, Yenti did not seem to notice the slop all over herself (or, perhaps, simply didn't care). The glory of the salami and cheese did overtake her mind, keeping her from the worldy problems of the corporeal. With a great sigh of satisfaction, Yenti had finished her sandwich. Tension in the room rose once more. After all, the old question arose once again with the disappearance of the salami. Which sandwich would Yenti choose next? "The next one should be...let's see...ah, yes, the one in the wrappings" Yenti said, and picked up the sandwich covered in paper wraps. She carefully undid the confines of the sandwich, and discovered the horrifying truth held within. "What the fuck?" It was entirely lettuce.